Tonight, I am the Ocean,
A body of water on to itself,
Depth unknown to man,
Roaring,
Howling,
Drowning my sorrow,
Moving in ways unbecoming to my false self.
Tonight, I am the Ocean,
Crashing on to the shore
Pulling back,
Gathering myself,
Reeling back the parts of me I gave away,
Ever so recklessly.
Tonight, I am the Ocean,
Regurgitating all the oil dumped into me
How did I let this happen?
How did we let it get this far?
How could you do this to me?
Tonight, I am the Ocean–all mighty
The earth quakes beneath
Calypso,
The belly of the beast
My wrath will drown
Everything you love
My vengeance knows the furthest reach.
Tonight, I am the Ocean–all mighty
The earth quakes beneath
Davy Jones locker,
The belly of the beast
My sorrow stirs the maelstrom
I am grief.
Tonight, I am the Ocean
I sway,
A moment of silence,
I grieve,
For the parts of me
Ruined
by men of your stature.
Tonight, I am the Ocean
I re-remember
That I existed long before you
And I will continue to be
Long after you disintegrate
from this plane of existence
Far, far away from me.
Charmaine //Gamxamûs is a Namibian poet and writer with a BSc in Nuclear Medicine Technology from the Cape Peninsula University of Technology in Cape Town. She placed second in the Goethe-Institut Namibia’s’ short story competition, In Times of Pandemic, for her story, “Dehisce”. Charmaine is a lover of language, expression, and storytelling through poetry, literature, and music and is a member of the 2022-2023 Doek Collective. She is a fellow of the Narrating Namibia, Narrating Africa Doek Emerging Writers Program. Charmaine published a children’s book in the inaugural Book Sprint Namibia titled, Myra’s Friends.