My insecurity is an elderly British aristocrat,
who worries constantly about my honour being at risk.
He worries over whether, if perhaps, I have waited too long to settle down
and the number of hand towels in my bathroom.
Over tea, he wonders if I shouldn’t shave all my body hair.
I would laugh but he makes a compelling case.
At parties, he reminds me of the direction of the kitchen.
In the office, he begs me to smile more.
In bed, he wonders if I could be a lot more encouraging,
and plans elaborate ways to reinvent me.
During the summer, he chides me not to get too dark.
At outings, he wonders if my friends still like me.
After a drink, he dreads me:
too brazen, too drunk, dreadfully embarrassing.
When we are alone, he muses over my mistakes,
carefully labelling them: shame, guilt, and loathing.
When he is away
I desperately seek his company.
Kina Indongo is a Namibian communications professional and poet. She has over five years of experience in corporate communications and media relations. A 2023 Mandela Washington Fellow, she holds a degree in media studies and English literature.